I think I may have picked the best year in the world to be single. Haven't you noticed? 2008 is just turning out to be the little engine that could. Choo Choo. Tax rebates. A landmark election. New workout crazes. Lovely eye candy. Intense debates. Assaults on global warming, poverty, and AIDS. I feel like I'm in the middle of a firestorm and I'm excited. People are finally waking up after almost a decade of fear and uncertainty and finding the joy in living.
Last night I had an interesting discussion about "falling into" and "falling out" of love. Precisely the reason I didn't blog last night was because I was entrenched in pushing my viewpoint that love is not something you fall into. Rather it is a lifestyle. We use the phrase "I fell in love" as if we slipped in a puddle of water and fell to our butts. Falling in love shouldn't be like the slippery slope. Love is a lifestyle. The reason that 1 in 2 marriages in this country ends in divorce is because people are falling versus climbing, stepping, jumping, leaping into living love. And I don't know about you, but thats a pretty daunting statistic. I will not become a statistic. The old cliche "well it was fun while it lasted" does nothing for me. How can you love someone with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind and spirit, one day... and then walk away the next? And that's what I discussed last night. If love is a lifestyle in which you make a commitment to another person, honor that. There's going to be fights and moments where you don't want to be there, moments where you'd rather be anywhere else, moments that are so bad that you wonder if you made the right decision - but you've lived to tell the tale. I've personally been through enough in my life that I can honestly say that I've made it through a few storms and lived to fight another day. What is it about love that makes people throw up their hands and walk away and move on to the next instant gratifying emotion with another person? Perhaps its because their love was based upon the "falling on your butt" phenomenon - and then finally they got up off the floor only to do it again and again - There are some sore butt bones in the world today.
Perhaps its not love that is the problem; perhaps its humanity, personality and psychosis. Love in its purest form is eternal, everlasting, unconditional, unstoppable. But inside human nature is Freud's ID always knawing away telling us "you can do better" "if you don't feel good, move on to the next thing that makes you feel good". So therefore when you combine the purest form of love with human nature's slant on reality - you get "falling into love"... a warped version of reality which bred the statistic that 50% of all first marriages end in divorce. So now that I've examined it a bit, I see that love within itself is not the problem, but the solution. It's the answer to human nature. It's a lifestyle, not a spur of the moment feeling or emotion. Love is freeing. I've never experienced that.
And if I ever do experience love as an emancipated lifestyle with another human being, and not just with my spiritual Father, then at that time I'm going to stand in front of my family and friends and say "I do." Bling Bling.
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